Scenarios. Hundreds of them. I thought it all out. This day was going to be perfect. I was hoping, against hope, you would do something I didn't see coming. Something cute, touching, charming. I dreamt we would spend the entire day together. Morning till night. You would hold me and whisper into my ear how you feel about me. We'd fall asleep for a couple hours in each others arms. Maybe watch a movie or two. We'd just be together, feeding off each others presence.
But dreaming is for sleeping. And reality is for being awake. The reality that this isn't perfect---not even close. The reality that we could hardly spend a couple hours together on our one year. The reality that you would rather invite Lakin and Brandon over than be alone with me.
The reality that we just don't work together.
As much as I want to, and as much as I can dream about it, I don't see us going further. Maybe we'll be together for a long time to come. Its possible we could last this whole year. But I don't see us advancing. I think you've reached your stopping point. I don't think you can grow with me more. As well as I don't think you could love me further.
I love you and I will wait. I will be patient and stand by you forever. I have no problem with waiting for you to mature. But if you aren't going to, if this is it, I need to know. Not a second waiting would be wasted if there is a future for us, but if there isn't... Well then I don't think I can dream much longer.
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